In Trevor Martin's documentary titled "Schooled: The Price of College Sports", he expresses that college athletes are treated unfairly by the NCAA and should not be exploited the way they are without pay. The author first argues with examples of the wrongdoings of the NCAA towards student athletes, he then adds to the argument with clips or stories of conflicts with the rule, and to conclude he addresses the audience with sources like interviews with past college athletes who had no money to provide for themselves. His purpose is to persuade the audience that consumerism and things like that are hurting college athletes and are against the rules. He seems to have an audience of future student athletes in mind to show the cautions of becoming a student athlete.
An example of how the NCAA has treated students unfairly is when a UCLA basketball player was put into a video game where he was not notified or paid for it. It was encouraged that being a student athlete could interfere with a student's education. Like when UNC running back Devin Ramsey was suspended for getting help from his tutor on an essay because of NCAA violation. Martin portrays that the NCAA's rules should either be changed or at least revised.
For the most part, well-written. Avoid phrases like "things like that" because it changes to an informal approach that takes away your credibility or seemingly understanding of the topic at hand.
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